LIKE MOTHER.....LIKE...DAUGHTER.....UH~ SO MUCH FOR THE WISH-FULFILLMENT DREAMS OF PARENTS.......

Yvonne, embarassed by her short arms, always kept them politely behind her back for photos.   She prayed that her daughter, Yvette, would be the 'girl' that Yvonne always wanted to have been....A tall beauty with arms like Audrey Hepburn and the femininity of Grace Kelly......Well, as 'luck would have it'.....'it' didn't turn out that way, did it?   After Yvette had her sex-reassignment surgery, after her tour of America as a Girl Scout Representative,  'she' reappeared from an eye-opening semester at Smith College, having decided to become a policeman,  Officer Yves....naturally equipped to fulfil his duty as 'the long arm of the Law'..... 

test to determine one's ability to follow written instructions...without a "cheater" drawing or photo-diagram .....to ascertain one's "Dexterity Intelligence Quotient"

 

Can you tie a simple trucker's knot? No...don't go online to "see" one, please......I've provided a graphic picture, after all.......just follow these "written" instructions! Look at the illustration for 15 seconds, then, tie the knot...without looking again at the illustration......o.k.? Here's how: secure one end of a rope to your first tie-down point, then make a quick-release loop between it and your second tie-down point.* now, thread the loose end of the rope through the second tie-down point, then back through the loop you just made, and pull to tighten..... once you've got the line as tight as you like, clamp down on the loop with your thumb and forefinger, then finish the knot by wrapping a section of loose line around the taut line and pulling it through..........if you wish to really lock off the end, simply wrap the new loose loop you created around the taut line and pull it through......however, you may prefer not to do this if you might prefer, at some time in the future, to undo the knot by simply tugging on the loose tail of line to unravel the whole package........ now, you try it! During a summer job, while in college, I wrote instruction manuals for the ABMA @ Redstone Arsenal......describing processes to be utilized to accomplish tasks such as the one above.......Have you ever read one of these "manuals"? {usually quick trips to total frustration} Most creatures watch a process then copy it.....Only humans can follow written words without illustrations.....Yeah, Yeah, I know.....I'm not talking about DNA replication or such, where the processes are unconscious........I'm talking about clarity of communication......

* to do this, grab a section of the rope in your hand and twist it clockwise three times, then pull a section of slack line through it until you have a taut loop

THE PATRICK BATEMAN-APPROVED KITCHEN BLOCK WEAPONRY......

 My kitchen resembles a warehouse for a 'knife-throwing act'......As much time as spend, in the kitchen, preparing food to eat or just to experiment with cooking it, i haven't utilized the ice-hardend, CrMoV, Chef's Knife' in a long time...except for the opening of large shipping boxes or hacking gigantic bamboo that threatens to upheave the house......Kathy Bates, Christian Bale, Matt Sbeglia, Norman Bates and "Jason" are fully equipped, or 'out of play' now, so i'm offering to trade the giant knife for a collection of flower-arranging frogs, a supply of exotic wild rices or a 'super deluxe' double-boiler..... or, perhaps, George Chakiris's switchblade from West Side Story......